By Jeff Luppino-Esposito
The last two days of the internet's life and every male can be summed up as follows:
Day 1: Cassie Nude Pictures. NSFW! NSFW! NSFW!
Are those nipple rings?!
Wait, who the hell is Cassie?
Who cares, this is sweet.
Day 2: Rihanna Nude Pictures?! MORE Nipple Rings!
You can't even see the bruises from Chris Brown!
Who the hell is Young Turk?
Who cares, this is sweet
The last two days of the internet's life and every female can be summed up as follows:
Day 1 + 2: Oh, there's my husband looking at the internet and touching himself again.
Now it's PopSense's turn (in all of its androgynous glory) to weigh in
From the 'WHAT THAT WASN'T EVEN GOOD AND THE NIGHT VISION LOOKED STUPID!' of A Night in Paris, to the pedophiliatastic Miley Cyrus shower pics to the good old fashion Pamela Anderson and Tommy Lee making the act of being on a boat super cool way before Andy Samberg, celebrity nudity, porn, and moderate indecent exposure has played a key role in the life of the unrelentingly horny internet user.
This latest two-day, two-part pseudo-porn extravaganza has been like a two-day, two-part Twilight Zone marathon except with Cassie, Rihanna, nudity, and no mystery whatsoever.
Being that we here at PopSense are obsessed with cultural trends and internet memes, I feel comfortable in saying that my masculinity has remained intact despite the fact that I spent about half as much time looking at the nude pictures themselves as I did tracking the google search trends regarding the topic.
Wait, before I continue, don't worry, I legitimately still have no idea who the hell Cassie is either.
Moving on, where were we, oh yes, google trend analysis yields greater sexual arousal than naked women.
It comes as no surprise that as of the time that this article was written, Rihanna's name (attached to terms such as: nude, naked, photo, pics, leaked, herpes, and twitter) appears 8 times in the top 100 search terms on google. It's inevitably less of an impressive showing for Cassie (4 times), but it is worth noting that search term number 24 is "Cassie Spread Eagle" which is just so explicitly vulgar that I had to repeat it in hopes of gaining some credit for the millions of people actively searching this image.
Also: Young Turk. What the hell does this mean. Why is it on all the Rihanna pictures? Is this some sort of political statement?! GODDAMMIT CAN SOMEONE TELL ME WHO THE HELL CASSIE IS?!?
Rihanna Nude: Russian Roulette
I thought RiRi already shot the video for "Russian Roulette", but no. She's shooting the video for it today in LA. Btw "Russian Roulette" will be released on Itunes on November 3rd (US), so I guess worldwide it will be released around that date too..It's a bit late, don't you think?
Rihanna Pictures
Rihanna Wax Figure in London
October 3, 2011
Rihanna Bikini Pictures
Last year Rihanna and Chris Brown took a short vacation in Barbados, also known as Rihanna's homeland. How Rihanna can continue to deny a relationship when there have been pictures of her sitting on his shoulders is anyone's guess.
Couple Rihanna and Chris Brown spending time together with family on the beach in Barbados. The couple swam in the ocean, rode some jet skis and even rode on some inner-tubes. There was no ring on Rihanna's finger which some were hoping for....